"We made stars, each, upon fourth reach"


I had an unusually vivid dream last night, though it seems much less interesting now that I'm awake than it was when I was wrapped up in it. For some reason I was the main character in Scrubs, which is quite odd because I've never actually seen Scrubs, merely heard it raved about by a former roommate. For some reason this episode involved the hospital's gym (and by gym I mean middle-school style gymnasium, meaning a large building filled with gym mats and fear). For some reason everyone was playing handball there, with a bunch of fake walls. Several characters, whom I don't know because I don't watch the show, were tasked with taking down one of the walls that had graffiti on it making reference to "China Bears." For some reason taking this down caused all the walls to fall down and then roll around. This caused comic hi-jinks as the walls chaotically carromed about the gym, levelling patients and employees while my compatriots meanwhile drove around in a clown car trying to round them up (largely unsuccessfully). I, meanwhile, sat and watched, making snide comments.

It bears mentioning, at this point, that my character's subplot involved him adopting the character of Lord Cheswick Daventry Thistlebottom IV and creating obscurely obscene victorian captions for newspaper photos, one of which you see in the title to this post.

After the commercial break (My dream had commercial breaks. If those commercials are to be believed, Jose Cuervo now makes rye whiskey, available in cheap delis and liquor stores near you!) we returned and found several of the wayward walls had escaped onto the highway. The boss character was scouting for the walls in one car, while one of the compatriots from earlier was driving a truck onto which they were loaded when aprehended. They found one, and after the boss pulled to a gradual stop, the truck driver stopped by crashing into a large dumpster.

At this point, for some reason, the dream paused while my former roommate gave me a lecture on how brilliant Scrubs is, since at this point they could make any number of inane one-liners, such as the boss saying "Remind me never to let X drive the company truck again!" but they brilliantly chose not to, for the same reason they have no laugh track. My disembodied self rolled its ethereal eyes and the dream resumed. Around this point my character contributed the line of doggerel from this post's title. I could sense myself waking up (my roommate had begun to shower, which is a sign the alarm's about to go off) so my dream quickly skipped ahead to the preview of next episode. My guess is that my snide remarks didn't go over too well, as the preview showed my ears being cut off and my spleen violently removed from my torso.


Huh. I generally don't remember my dreams in a way that is quite so detailed. However, after last week's Pep Rally, I did have a dream that they changed my school's mascot to the "Hypnotized Gophers".

Man, that'd be awesome. I wish I was a hypnotized gopher.

I don't usually remember dreams, either, but this one was unusually vivid and I got I posted this right after I woke up, when I still remembered it. I was fuzzy on some of the details, though.

I distinctly remember I used to have a lot of at-school-in-underpants dreams back in middle school. Then I stopped sleeping in my underpants and they went away.

Yeah, every once in a while I'll have an unusually memorable dream. Like the one where Maggie killed one of her classmates with a pair of scissors. You know, those annoying right handed/left handed now everybody can use scissors ones that are all uncomfortable. Then she turned the scissors on me when I attempted to show her the error of her ways.
So, uh...when you say "stopped sleeping in your underpants", you meant that you realised you should put on more clothes, right?

That's a little creepy. Maggie, of all people? She never expresses rage at anything! Of course, you could argue she's just bottling all the abuse you give her up inside, waiting to explode one day.

And I believe what happened was I moved on to High School, where, after a brief pajama-y interlude, I started just sleeping in all my clothes from the day before. I was kind of an odd kid.

Waitaminute. Back to your first post: You went to a pep rally last week? What the hell? Were you whacked out on goofballs? Did somebody drag you?

Well, that's part of where the "Hypnotized Gophers" comes from. Our Pep Rallys are mandatory assemblys where we are told to have Bronco Pride or suffer the consequences.

Ew. RB is like an authoritarian Hitler Land compared to Mount Carmel. I went four years without going to a pep rally. I imagine the cheers were something like "Just because we're massively overcrowded and half our classrooms are trailers plunked in the parking lot doesn't mean we don't have SPIRIT! S-P-I-R-I-T! GoooooooooOOOOO SUNDEVILS!"

You two crack me up.

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This page contains a single entry by Zach published on September 13, 2005 9:22 AM.

PSA: Be Kind to Poll Workers was the previous entry in this blog.

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